letters from the past 12
Saturday, January 31, 1998
Hello it's me,
How are you doing Bebek Bebek? It's been quite a long time since you last written to me. I am sure a bunch of things have changed since. It's funny, with you every time we talk there is something new. I hope your news are good and you are doing better both financially and emotionally. Don't you feel lonely, because I always think about you and love you very much. You are not alone; I can't be there physically but my thoughts are with you.
And about financially, are you making any progress in earning money? What is your plan about paying this $6000 on Amex? This whole thing is bothering me tremendously, especially because they are calling Ali's number to reach me and also because they are turning me to collection which means I may get arrested when I go to NY in April. I hope you are not ignoring it.
Are you going to US anytime soon? The last bad news is that to keep the green card, we have to make an entry every six months. Apparently they are tolerant the first time but then not a day over six months. There is a nine-day holiday in mid-April, I'll go then. Do you think it may be a good idea for you to go there for a month or so to get some work? You never had a serious money problem in NY and it may be a good idea to keep your relations with your US clients alive. Don't think that I am putting my nose in your business, but this Amex bill is a big time problem for me (the fact that my parents know about it makes it twice as big). Thinking that I may have to pay for this gives me a headache. If so, I won't be able to get a place for a year or so. I will hate you for life (I am using the word in its real sense and not in Elif sense).
My first real shoot is starting next Wednesday. It's going to be a tough week. I really like my job though. I had a baby casting session the other day, no need to tell you how much fun I had.
It's quite cold in Istanbul since last weekend. Today is the last day of Ramadan holiday. This was the holiday I was planning to come over to see you. I could have been there since Wednesday afternoon and wouldn't have to leave until tomorrow. You never sent me that letter of course. Makes me wonder if you really wanted me to come over.
Ates told me that he referred a director to you. Did he call you? He also told me about Fusun's miscarriage. That must have been devastating to them.
G is calling me often. They couldn't find a job yet and they maybe coming back in a few months if they can't. It won't be good for me of course because where will I stay in NY every six months? Also, I would like to keep the place just in case. Once they decide, I may have to find someone to sublet. It will be a little tough from here.
I saw "Copland" the other day. So so. There are a few movies that I want to see. How about you? Did you see or heard anything good recently? I can't remember what the last movie we saw together was. Sad, I can't remember the last time we went out to eat, the last time we traveled somewhere, nor the last time we made love. It must be because I never thought they would be the last times. Miss you too much.
I think I mentioned to you about the check-up I got done. They found something in the ultrasound images. It may be something malignant or nothing. I am not going to know for a couple of months. I try not to think about this and I am quite successful at it most of the time. But sometimes it hits me and makes everything meaningless.
Write to me Cookielo, it's good to touch something you sent to me.
Cok you, think about me! Don't forget the rest of the stuff that I wrote.
Kisses.
Hello it's me,
How are you doing Bebek Bebek? It's been quite a long time since you last written to me. I am sure a bunch of things have changed since. It's funny, with you every time we talk there is something new. I hope your news are good and you are doing better both financially and emotionally. Don't you feel lonely, because I always think about you and love you very much. You are not alone; I can't be there physically but my thoughts are with you.
And about financially, are you making any progress in earning money? What is your plan about paying this $6000 on Amex? This whole thing is bothering me tremendously, especially because they are calling Ali's number to reach me and also because they are turning me to collection which means I may get arrested when I go to NY in April. I hope you are not ignoring it.
Are you going to US anytime soon? The last bad news is that to keep the green card, we have to make an entry every six months. Apparently they are tolerant the first time but then not a day over six months. There is a nine-day holiday in mid-April, I'll go then. Do you think it may be a good idea for you to go there for a month or so to get some work? You never had a serious money problem in NY and it may be a good idea to keep your relations with your US clients alive. Don't think that I am putting my nose in your business, but this Amex bill is a big time problem for me (the fact that my parents know about it makes it twice as big). Thinking that I may have to pay for this gives me a headache. If so, I won't be able to get a place for a year or so. I will hate you for life (I am using the word in its real sense and not in Elif sense).
My first real shoot is starting next Wednesday. It's going to be a tough week. I really like my job though. I had a baby casting session the other day, no need to tell you how much fun I had.
It's quite cold in Istanbul since last weekend. Today is the last day of Ramadan holiday. This was the holiday I was planning to come over to see you. I could have been there since Wednesday afternoon and wouldn't have to leave until tomorrow. You never sent me that letter of course. Makes me wonder if you really wanted me to come over.
Ates told me that he referred a director to you. Did he call you? He also told me about Fusun's miscarriage. That must have been devastating to them.
G is calling me often. They couldn't find a job yet and they maybe coming back in a few months if they can't. It won't be good for me of course because where will I stay in NY every six months? Also, I would like to keep the place just in case. Once they decide, I may have to find someone to sublet. It will be a little tough from here.
I saw "Copland" the other day. So so. There are a few movies that I want to see. How about you? Did you see or heard anything good recently? I can't remember what the last movie we saw together was. Sad, I can't remember the last time we went out to eat, the last time we traveled somewhere, nor the last time we made love. It must be because I never thought they would be the last times. Miss you too much.
I think I mentioned to you about the check-up I got done. They found something in the ultrasound images. It may be something malignant or nothing. I am not going to know for a couple of months. I try not to think about this and I am quite successful at it most of the time. But sometimes it hits me and makes everything meaningless.
Write to me Cookielo, it's good to touch something you sent to me.
Cok you, think about me! Don't forget the rest of the stuff that I wrote.
Kisses.
posted by Goldfish @ 4:50 AM
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